My Strange Addiction: Packing Peanuts

 

Amy Ballard '19: Little known fact: packing peanuts are edible. Usually when I receive them in packages, I eat all of them. The first time I ate a packing peanut was too early for me to remember. It’s perfectly safe.

 

Upper School Director Chris Lynch: You know, tobacco companies also say their products are perfectly safe.

 

Amy: But this is true! Packing peanuts are made of starch, and they dissolve in your mouth. Mr. Lynch, have you ever eaten one?

 

Lynch: Absolutely not, and I will not start today.

 

Amy: If you smell them, they smell just like a rice cake. My dad is a space engineer who designs and builds spacecraft, and in his free time, he eats packing peanuts.

 

Ava Mendelssohn ‘19: If you add Kraft mac and cheese powder to the packing peanuts, you can make cheese doodles!

 

Math Teacher Arthur Dejohn passed by as we were debating whether or not we could eat packing peanuts. He came in and testified that if packing peanuts are made of starch and therefore edible, they would dissolve in water. We proceeded with an experiment, in which we proved that the packing peanut did indeed dissolve. With extra encouragement from a passing Biology Teacher Lisa Craig, who stated, “The ones made of potato starch are edible,” our packing peanuts became SNACKING peanuts.

 

After trying some myself, I decided to ask every girl who walked into Mr. Lynch’s office to try a snacking peanut. We recorded all the reviews and asked the students to rate their experience on a scale of 1-10. Here are some food product testimonies:

 

Ava Mendelsohn ’19: When you eat them, they do taste like food. I’m still upset that Amy eats the whole box of them though. 8/10

 

Delaney Bond ’19: I love rice cakes. Give me another one! 10.5/10. Can I have another one? *eats three more*

 

DJ  Taylor ‘19: Oh my God, this tastes like rice cakes!  Are they vegan? Oh, they are? Wow, this isn’t bad. 10/10.

 

Chloe Ross ’19: [Katie: Do it for the blog.] Ugh, okay… Actually, 11/10. Really good.

 

Annie Pingle ’20: It’s honestly not that bad. It’s low-key good… No wait, it feels weird on my throat now. It might be burning me. 7/10

 

Eliza Geichner ’20: This IS good!!! Wait, it tasted like some food… rice cakes! Wow! A little bland, but it’s okay! I’m going to try it again in the future! 6.5/10

 

Eden Halpert ’19: I see why they’re appealing, but they triggered my gag reflex. The taste is really strong. 2/10

 

Daniella Nichols ’20: 10/10. It was so good. Where are they from? I want some more.

 

Christina Denovio ’20: I licked it but then decided against eating it. I would give it a 4/10. It could have been worse.

 

Kayla Twedt ’19: Wait, that actually tastes good! 10/10! Perfect experience. I am what I eat, so I am a packing peanut.

 

Lillian Broeksmit ’20: Why is this actually edible?! This is what pirate booty tastes like without the cheese 11.5/10

 

Overall, Holton girls gave snacking peanuts 8.34/10! Not bad for something made primarily for transporting goods in boxes. Be sure to tune in next week for the next episode of Humans of Holton! If you would like to share your strange addiction, hit us up!

 

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