A Series of Unfortunate Events

 

In honor of the recent disturbance by a tornado warning during the Choral Assembly (Sorry, Swing. You all were amazing), we decided to ask Holton girls about their greatest unfortunate events. We were expecting embarrassing stories, funny accidents and other happenings of the sort. The responses we received, however, were surprising.

 

In typical Holton fashion, most responses detailed school-related fails ranging from classes gone wrong to bad test scores.

 

Senior: When I completely bombed my math exam and got a 50%, my teacher gave me a 72% out of pity. I don’t know where he got that number.

 

Freshman: I got a 59% on a grammar quiz last week. 

 

Senior: CHEM EXAM.

 

Senior: I got a 55% on a bio test. 

 

Eighth Grader: 62% on a quiz. 

 

Senior: My Calc AB exam. 

 

Senior: Taking French. 

 

Junior: Reddinger Chemistry class.

 

 

Other girls felt as if one problem isn’t enough and as if there is always something looming over them.

 

Junior: My life. 

 

Senior: I am perpetually concussed. 

 

 

Last but not least, many girls responded with their most awkward moments, where they likely went beet red.

 

Senior: I almost called Mr. Lee “Dad” once. I don’t even call my own dad “Dad.” 

 

Junior: One time, I was penny boarding in front of my house, and I thought I was the coolest, but then I fell in front of all the cool kids. I tried to walk it off but soon fell again. 

 

Senior: I fell asleep in the Shakespeare assembly, and the performer stopped to yell at me. 

 

Junior: Hugging a man in a store that I thought was my dad but wasn’t. 

 

Senior: I fell up the stairs and got a paper cut on my nose.

 

Junior: Falling down on my knees while running to third base (I can slide I promise). 

 

Senior: In freshman year, I was playing with Mr. Sowers’s son and I accidentally hit him straight in the face with a ball. 

 

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